Step inside the mind of my husband

A few years ago we were planning a trip to California. I suggested that we bike across the Golden Gate bridge (doesn't that sound fun!) This was his response:
"why would I pay to do that when someone can kick me in the nuts for free?"

It's Not Always Gonna Be Easy

Recently, when I listen to people talk on the news about the little girl Christina who was killed in the Arizona shooting I can't help but make compairisons to Lady Jane. When they were describing her, "A very tenacious little girl but still very sensitive." I couldn't help but think that would be how I would describe my daughter. Then, morbid as it may sound, I couldn't help but think about what our lives would be like without our little tasmanian devil and I didn't like what I saw.

While Lady Jane challenges me everyday, she has made me take a good look at the person I am and be aware of how I am living my life. Having her here on the planet has made me a better person. I think I have also mentioned before how boring life would be without a little crazy in it.

I hope she realizes that while we frequently may but heads I am so very thankful she is in my life, and thank God for allowing me the chance to raise her.

I Felt God's love in the bathroom at Carribean Cove

Let me tell you why I love tankini's. It is not because they are so fashionable. I love tankini's because when you are at the pool with two little girls they make going to the bathroom a snap. One of my pet peeves is pulling with all my force to get an already wet swimsuit back up your body, while the suit hugs defiantly around your thighs. It seems the harder you pull the tighter the suit becomes around your legs. Therefore, it is the suit of choice for me and my two daughters.

So, now let me tell you why I hate tankini's. There is more to keep track of when you are packing a swim bag. Once, I sent Lady Jane to camp only to get a call when they were on the way to the pool because I had apparently given her Lady Janes top and Baby girls bottom. In my defense, Lady Jane only realized they were not her bottoms when she could not pull them up past her knees.

That being said, I will begin my story. Lady Jane and Buster brown won a trip to Carribean Cove, an indoor waterpark, for selling an obsene amount of magazines for the schools fundraiser. I needed to take advantage of their free admission sometime over winter break and my time was quickly dwindling away. I decided really on the last possible day I would venture bymyself with my three crazy children to the water park which was an hour away from my house.

I packed the swim bag making sure I had a suit for everyone (I have made that mistake before) and that all the suits had their respected pieces. I checked and then double checked and we were off.

We entered the steaming water park and headed to the bathrooms to change in our suits. "This is going to be so fun!" Baby girl exclaimed. Lady Jane quickly snatched her suit and went into a changing room. I started digging for the rest our suits in the buldging swim bag.

"Mom! You didn't pack me a top, only a bottom and the cover-up skirt that goes with it!" Lady Jane shouts in despiration.

"No, your joking." I say knowing full well that she is not at all joking. I had forgotten that this particular tankini had a cover-up skirt that went with it. Lady Jane pulled back the curtain, tears welling up in her eyes and her chin begins to quiver. I am trying to think of all the ways I could remedy this situation. She clearly can not swim in the long sleeve shirt she is wearing with the skirt on the bottom. I am starting to wonder in my head if I can fashion the fast food wrappers on the floor in my car into some sort of a bikini when my daydream is interupted.

"Did you forget her top?" asks a friendly Mom in the dressing room who has heard everything go down.

"Yes" I say defeated, my head hung in shame.

"You can have my daughters." She says as she hands me the exact size tankini top I need. I stand there in disbelief for a moment holding the suit.

"but how will I get it back to you?" I protest.

"it is OK, I need to buy my daughter a new suit anyway." she informs me.

I thank her profusly, but feel like no amount of words can really let her know how much her act of kindness has meant to me. We all leave the dressing room feeling so appreciative we are able to enjoy the waterpark.

I long for a time when I can pay it forward, from this strangers act of kindness and make someone feel as loved as I did when she handed my that wet tankini top.

Moms! Has this ever happened to you?

It is the end of the day, you just wrestled three kids into bed and you collapse on the couch in a heap. You feel drained of all energy and find you can't even hold your head up properly. You decided to let your heavy cheek fall into your hand in an effort to keep your noggin looking up. That is when you soon discover that your hands have the strange odor of soap and poop.

While a normal person would remove their hand in disgust you find you are too tired. Instead you start to ponder how a smell like that could even come to be? Wouldn't the soap wash away the poop? Is there poop somewhere else besides my hand you could be smelling?

I'm just saying, these are questions a Mom asks herself.

Fall, Fun but Dangerous

We decided a great way to spend a weekend in October would be to go to the dairy farm festival. They had a hay mound to climb, a corn maze, a tiny train for the kids to ride, a hay ride, not to mention being able to see the baby and grown up cows. It was a lot of fun.

One of the attractions that particularly entertained my children was the "Corn Crib." The corn crib was a barn that had two giant boxes like sand boxes only instead of sand they were filled with corn. You could dig and slide and have a great time in this corn. Lady Jane even informed me that one little girl jumped into the corn with a skirt on and when she stood up the skirt was no longer. Now that is fun.

When the corn crib had lost it's appeal we moved on. We spent hours doing different activities they had on the farm. Before we left we decided we would let the kids play on the hay mound one more time. Hubby and I sat blissfully on the side as our children played. Suddenly, we were snapped out of our blissful state by the cry of baby girl running over, "My tush hurts!"

"OK, did you fall down on it?"
"No"
"Did you poop in your pants?"
"No"
So the mystery of the hurting tushy was not solved there. We did, however, decide that this would be a good stopping point and to top the afternoon off with a trip to Dairy Queen. On the car ride to Dairy Queen, Baby Girl continues her screams, "MY. TUSH. HURTS!" I felt baffled, I didn't know what to do for her.

When we arrived at Dairy Queen we soon discovered that several sports teams had also settled on an afternoon at the Queen and the place was packed. After we got in line I quickly informed my husband I was going to take Baby Girl to the bathroom. This is when she yelled, "I DON'T HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM, I JUST NEED TO GET THIS CORN OUT OF MY TUSH!"

The record player scratched, both the football and softball teams stop and look. I gave them the look of, 'What? You've never had corn in your tush?' then push past them into the bathroom. I pull down Baby Girl's pants and like machine gun fire kernels of corn hit the floor of the bathroom.

Mystery solved.

From the Mouths of Babes

Me: "Baby girl, go put on some underwear."

Baby Girl: "Why? Are we going somewhere?"

Me: "No, it's just that wearing underwear is a good thing to do."

An Actual Conversation from My House

I received a Victoria's Secret catalog in the mail

"Why are all these Mommy's only wearing underwear?" Buster Brown asks so innocently.

"Oh my son, I am pretty certain that those are NOT Mommy's!"